Ask A Scholar: Advice from a Peer

September 15, 2015

Culture, Opinion

By Jenifer Guzman

“I’m having trouble balancing school, and I desperately need a job. How can I bring peace to the chaos?”

You have to be focused on school and your work, you cannot have too many distractions in your way. At school what you can do is try and finish all your work in class. Try and apply for a job where they can work with the hours you already have open;  on the weekends you can go to work for longer hours. Some of the places that are currently hiring for part time positions in Rio Rancho are:

  • AppleBee’s
  • Wendy’s
  • Carl’s Jr.

“I am having a difficult time because my dad is in another state, and my sister is in another. I am also really missing the people at my old church and school. Also, my health is getting worse, and I am always in a constant state of pain.”

If you really miss your dad and sister try and talk to them on a regular basis. My older sister left to the military and we had little contact with her. Every now and then she would call us but it was rare for her to call since she has such a busy schedule. Due to the fact that she wasn’t able to call as much, I would send letters to her. I would write whenever I was sad, happy, or just felt like writing. I personally think that writing letter to your dad and sister will help you talk about topics you would not usually say over the phone; same with your old friends and church. writing letters are meaningful, because you take the time to tell them how you feel; you can also keep the letters as a memory of your friends, sister, and dad.

To help your health get better, exercise more. For example every day after school you can go walk your dog or go to the park and play with your dog. For your pain, eat more fruit, like grapes or berries,and bananas help with cramps. Another pain reliever is to stretch or do yoga. You can stretch when you wake up every morning to help relax your muscles, so they are not so tense.

“At the moment I feel incredibly lonely, it feels like I have no friends or anyone to talk to, etc. Do you by chance have any advice on how to get over this feeling?”

When I first came to the ask academy I felt the exact same way. What I did to help was that I talked to someone about it. I had a lot of friends it just didn’t feel like they wanted to be with so as I said before I told one of my closest friends how I felt. Their response was that they also felt alone; they just didn’t want to tell anyone because they felt like it was selfish. My advice to you is that when you feel alone talk to a friend and they will help you, everyone has felt alone at some point and it is horrible feeling. If you tell someone they will understand.

“I have too much stuff to carry so I forget a lot of stuff.”

If you have too many assignments or stuff to carry, create some reminders that will help you. As soon as you need to do something write a note and put it somewhere where you will see it. You can put notes on your bedroom door so when you start to leave your room you will remember what you have to take or what is due. Or if you are in school you could put your notes on the top of your computer or laptop. Also invest in a good backpack that has a lot of pockets that will help you be organized; have one bag for all of your school supplies.

“I’m having trouble breaking out of my shell with new people.”

If you are too shy to talk to a new person by yourself, try and incorporate them in a conversation you are having with your friends. I am really bad when it come to talking to new people, so sometimes when I see them alone, I’ll go talk to them with a friend, that way I feel more comfortable talking to a new person. I will also just go sit next to them during class sometimes and help them with something if they are confused. There are many ways to help you talk to new people but for me, these two tricks have helped me in the past.

“My attention span sucks and I get anxious all the time.”

Try things that help you focus more. Listen to music if it helps calm you down. Some people chew gum, other sit by themselves. There are many ways to help you focus and concentrate on what you are working on. It all just depends on what helps you focus better. When you start to become anxious the first step to calm yourself down is admit that you are feeling anxious.  After you have admitted to yourself that you are anxious, you can try some things that may help:

  • Focus on your breathing, slowly breath in and out
  • You can talk to someone that you trust and tell them how you feel
  • Try and exercise
  • If you’re in school get up and go for a little walk and think positive thoughts
  • You can also try sitting on the floor and name an object you see and name a detail about it, then you name a detail about that detail. This will focus your thoughts and keep your mind from racing.

When I start to become overwhelmed or anxious I take a break from what I am working on and eat a snack to help clear my head of so many thoughts. As soon as I clear my brain of so many doubts I look at the positive side of things. For example, if I’m working on a project, I will look at how good I expected certain things to end up, or how I have done so much work that it looks like there is not much left to do.

“I feel influenced to not be myself.”

If you are being influenced to be  someone other than yourself, try talking to different people at school. It is not easy to step outside your comfort zone, but no one should feel like they have to be someone they are not. Also, sometimes spending time alone helps you gain clarity about who you are. When you are  alone, you have no one to impress, and no group to try and fit into. You don’t care about your appearance or how you act when you’re alone. When you are at school, try and focus on your school work, and choose to hang around people who encourage you to be yourself.



Subscribe to our RSS feed and social profiles to receive updates.

Comments are closed.

%d bloggers like this: